I was talking to my mum about fear today, False Evidence Appearing Real. How many of you have stopped yourself from doing something because you felt what you associate as fear? Maybe the rollercoaster looked too high, maybe you were scared of singing in front of people, or perhaps you wanted to go for that promotion but couldn’t face it. We live our lives surrounded by our own excuses and in the end, they determine how much of life we will actually see.
To be transparent, here are my fears:
• I want to be my own boss one day, choose my own hours, write for myself and earn money from it – but I have no idea how to start
• I want to move abroad, but I won’t know anyone and what if I can’t find work or it all fails miserably
• I’m worried I will get stuck in the repetitiveness of life and forget to actually go out and do something with mine when I’m in the prime time to do so.
• Spiders, because one minute they’re on the other side of the room and then suddenly they’re on your head.
So maybe that last one isn’t something I can deal with in the same way as the top three, but it’s a fear none the less.
Fear is often in your head, if anything, my bullet points should demonstrate that. My fear could prevent me from getting on and living the life I really want to live. I’m twenty-two right now, I don’t have any dependants, I earn a decent wage, I currently still live at home (sorry mum), I am in the best possible position to go out there and get what I want. But will I do it?
To throw a Nelson Mandela quote in ‘I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear’. It seems to me that if you want to do something and fear is stopping you, you have two options: a) don’t do it b) push through the fear and do it. Perhaps we started associating being scared of something as being a negative thing, but really couldn’t it be seen as an opportunity to be brave and to grow? Let’s take my fear of spiders for example, if I was forced to hold a spider in my hand, would my fear diminish slightly? Would I then be able to remove spiders from my house without calling for assistance or fleeing to the other side of the room? Would facing that tiny and silly fear that I have enable me to live a little better because of it?
We have to start somewhere, whether it’s standing next to a spider or googling how to work freelance. I’m not writing this blog because I know what I’m talking about, I’m writing it because I know I want to face my fears and I want to live the best life I can. It’s very easy to keep putting off what you want to achieve, telling yourself tomorrow will be the day, but why do that to yourself?
I don’t want to keep saying I will do something that I have no intention of ever actually doing, I want to start getting on with things. And I will be starting with this blog, I will be forming a schedule that I will be sticking to, writing regularly content, interesting content, content that makes my readers interact and look for more. I’m going to attempt to make my dream a reality and start in the only way I know how.
What dreams do you have? Have you ever faced your fears?